Shit List

April 17th, 2008 Leave a comment Go to comments

The following is an enumerated list of Official Guild Pet Peeves and Be-No’s (“There will be no…” etc — get it?) Thou shalt not be found guilty of any of the things on this list, or else thou shalt get what’s coming to you.

WE HATE:

  1. People in beautiful cars with sour looks on their faces. If you’re in a God damned Cobra, you have no excuse to be frowning. In fact, just give me the car. I’ll show you how it’s done.
  2. Netscrape. Nuff said.
  3. AOL.
  4. Apple. Noticing a trend here?
  5. Any distribution of Linux that must be PIRATED in order to be had for free.
  6. Anemic, wannabe calibers masquerading as real firepower (I’m looking at YOU, 9mm).
  7. Cell phones. (Scorpio likes his cell phone, but hates idiots who use it excessively or improperly. Scorpio also despises land-line phones.)
  8. Stupid people.
  9. Pokemon.
  10. Al Gore.
  11. Hillary Clinton
  12. Barrack Obama (it rhymes with Osama, for Christ’s sake! And it rymes with ‘Yo momma’. :D ‘Nuff said).
  13. Windows ME.
  14. Price-gouged video cards (anyone who has bought an 8800 GT or Ultra knows what I’m talking about!).
  15. Half-assed beta video drivers.
  16. Soggy, cold French fries — or fries without enough salt.
  17. “Freedom” fries. My language can beat up your language — and that gives it the right to abuse even the name of your language, even to the point of applying it to a completely unrelated food.
  18. Slow-ass dial-up internet connections.
  19. Slow-ass ancient computers still running Windows 98 (or older!). (Bishop says: Or newer!) (Scorpio says: True! *YOU* try running XP on an Pentium II with only 192 MBs of RAM!)
  20. **SPOILERS** Having to re-assemble HK-47 in KotOR II just so I can listen to his wonderful bloodthirsty smart-ass comments and psychotic philosophical meanderings again…
  21. People who make things harder than they should be.
  22. Windows Vista….except for the Aero skin. :-D
  23. Service packs for Windows that don’t fix shit (Vista SP1…*cough*)
  24. Games that *should* have been good but got fucked up (the recent Turok comes to mind…)
  25. Phrases such as “not infrequently.”
  26. HK-50.
  27. Uncooked vegetables.
  1. Bishop
    December 13th, 2007 at 12:14 | #1
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    My, my, my, but aren’t we full of hate! Good. Let your hate flow through you. Embrace the power of the dark side!

  2. 2Cold Scorpio
    December 13th, 2007 at 12:18 | #2
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    “You can call me Darth Balls.” –Jay, Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back

  3. pgepps
    February 2nd, 2008 at 21:08 | #3
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    i hate black themes with red type like my eyes bleeding trying to read the small pressed together white type like too many similes in this line like something from one of Whitman’s more tendentious passages

  4. 2Cold Scorpio
    February 3rd, 2008 at 22:01 | #4
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    I hate white backgrounds with black text on websites. It showes no imagination nor courage. And its hard on my eyes. Side note: one of these days sometime this decade eventually, Bishop will make it so you can pick from two themes, much like how Gamespot does it. In the meantime, you can try wishing in one hand and crapping in the other and see which fills first. *shrug* Or better, use a Jedi mind trick to get him to hurry the hell up… Bwahahaha, thats a good one, all right….

  5. Bishop
    June 18th, 2009 at 14:07 | #5
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    There will be no hurrying of the Bishop. Not in this century or the next. /finalword!

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